K-Pop Veteran Soyou Reflects on Career Sacrifices: "I Regret Not Dating More in My Twenties"

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Seoul, South Korea – October 20, 2026 – In a candid revelation that has resonated deeply within the K-pop community and beyond, former SISTAR member Soyou has expressed a profound sense of regret over not prioritizing romantic relationships during her most formative years as an idol. The sentiment, shared during a recent YouTube broadcast, offers a poignant glimpse into the personal sacrifices often made by artists navigating the demanding landscape of the entertainment industry.

Soyou, a seasoned performer whose career began in 2010 with the immensely popular girl group SISTAR, appeared on a segment titled "Love Counseling Room: Dating Edition" on October 19th. The program, hosted on YouTube, featured Soyou responding to letters from viewers seeking advice on various personal matters. It was a letter from a woman in her twenties, grappling with the perceived impossibility of balancing a demanding schedule with the pursuit of romance, that prompted Soyou’s heartfelt confession.

The letter writer articulated a common dilemma faced by many young professionals: the feeling of being overwhelmed by a busy life, leading to a fear of starting a relationship without the emotional bandwidth to dedicate to it, and the potential to inadvertently hurt a partner. This concern, Soyou stated, struck a chord.

The Pressures of Stardom: A Twenty-Something Dilemma

Soyou’s response was not dismissive but rather empathetic, drawing directly from her own lived experience. She acknowledged the intensity of her twenties, a period characterized by relentless training, back-to-back promotions, and the constant pressure to maintain a public image. However, she firmly countered the notion that such a busy life inherently precludes romantic involvement.

"Babies are born even in times of war," Soyou stated, employing a stark analogy to emphasize that life, and by extension, love, finds a way even amidst chaos. "Do you think I wasn’t busy in my twenties? I was busy too. But there’s always time for dating." This assertion underscores a fundamental belief that prioritizing personal relationships, even amidst a demanding career, is not only possible but perhaps essential for a well-rounded life.

A Season of Youthful Love: The "Freshest Kind of Love"

The crux of Soyou’s regret lies in the unique quality of romantic experiences during one’s early twenties. She described this period as offering the "freshest kind of love," a sentiment that speaks to the uninhibited exploration and intense emotions often associated with young adulthood.

Female K-Pop Idol Regrets Not Dating Enough During Her Heyday

"I still regret not dating more in my twenties," Soyou admitted, her voice carrying a tone of wistful reflection. "That’s because it was the freshest kind of love. Even though you’re an adult, it’s still cute. You should date as much as you can while you can." Her words suggest that the innocence, the lack of ingrained cynicism, and the sheer novelty of early romantic entanglements are experiences that, once passed, cannot be fully replicated.

This perspective is particularly poignant given Soyou’s career trajectory. SISTAR, active from 2010 to 2017, experienced immense success, dominating the charts with a string of hits that defined a generation of K-pop. Their peak years coincided precisely with Soyou’s twenties, a period of intense dedication to her group and her career. The group’s demanding schedules, including extensive international tours, album preparations, and public appearances, would have left little room for casual dating or serious romantic pursuits.

Supporting Data: The K-Pop Idol’s Rigorous Schedule

The K-pop industry is notoriously demanding, with idols often living under strict management and intense scrutiny from a young age. Training can begin in early adolescence, with trainees undergoing rigorous vocal, dance, and performance instruction for years before their debut.

  • Training Period: K-pop idols typically undergo several years of intensive training, often starting in their early teens. This involves long hours of practice, often exceeding 12-14 hours a day, six days a week.
  • Debut and Promotions: Upon debut, the schedule intensifies dramatically. This includes:
    • Album Releases: Preparing for new albums involves intensive recording, choreography practice, music video shoots, and promotional activities that can span several months.
    • Music Shows: Idols perform on weekly music shows, requiring daily attendance for rehearsals and live broadcasts.
    • Variety Shows and Interviews: Extensive appearances on television programs and interviews are crucial for building popularity and promoting their music.
    • Concerts and Fan Meetings: Domestic and international tours, along with fan meetings, consume significant time and energy.
    • Endorsements and CFs: Many idols are brand ambassadors, requiring them to participate in photoshoots, commercials, and promotional events.
  • Strict Rules and Regulations: Entertainment companies often impose strict rules on their artists, including restrictions on dating, social media use, and personal finances, particularly during their early careers. This is often framed as protecting the artist’s image and ensuring their focus on their career.

Given this environment, it becomes clear why Soyou, like many of her peers, would have found it exceptionally challenging to cultivate and maintain romantic relationships. The very nature of their profession often necessitates a significant degree of isolation from everyday life, including typical social interactions where romantic relationships often begin.

The "Freshness" of Youthful Romance: A Psychological Perspective

Soyou’s emphasis on the "freshness" of love in one’s twenties can be understood through a psychological lens. This period is often characterized by:

  • Identity Formation: The twenties are a crucial period for solidifying personal identity, and early romantic experiences can play a significant role in shaping one’s understanding of relationships, intimacy, and self-worth.
  • Emotional Openness: Compared to later years, young adults may be more emotionally open and less guarded, allowing for deeper connections and a more uninhibited expression of affection.
  • Novelty and Exploration: The world of romance is often new and exciting in one’s twenties, filled with first experiences of deep love, heartbreak, and learning about oneself within a partnership. This novelty can be intensely captivating.
  • Less Life Experience: While this can sometimes lead to naivety, it also means a lack of pre-existing baggage or deeply ingrained relationship patterns that can complicate later-life romances. There’s a rawness and authenticity that can be harder to recapture.

Soyou’s regret, therefore, is not simply about missing out on romantic companionship, but about missing out on a specific, perhaps irreplaceable, phase of emotional and personal development that is intrinsically linked to youthful love.

Female K-Pop Idol Regrets Not Dating Enough During Her Heyday

Official Responses and Industry Implications

While there have been no official statements from Soyou’s former agency, Starship Entertainment, regarding her personal reflections, her candidness is likely to resonate with many within the K-pop industry. The idol culture often promotes an image of unwavering dedication to fans and career, with personal lives frequently taking a backseat.

Soyou’s words could spark a broader conversation within entertainment agencies and among artists themselves about the importance of work-life balance and the potential long-term emotional impact of prioritizing career above all else, especially during formative years.

  • Fan Reception: The immediate reaction from fans on social media has been overwhelmingly supportive and understanding. Many have expressed admiration for Soyou’s honesty and have shared similar feelings of regret about missed opportunities due to career demands. This suggests a growing awareness and empathy among the K-pop fandom for the personal sacrifices made by their idols.
  • Industry Discourse: Soyou’s statement may encourage other idols to speak more openly about their personal lives and the challenges they face. This could lead to a more nuanced portrayal of idol life, moving beyond the idealized image often presented to the public.
  • Mental Health Focus: The conversation also touches upon the mental well-being of idols. The relentless pressure and lack of personal time can contribute to stress, burnout, and feelings of isolation. Soyou’s reflection highlights the potential emotional cost of such a demanding career.

Looking Forward: A Call for Balance

Soyou’s advice to the letter writer—"Just start first. Things change once you do"—is a call to action, urging individuals not to let fear or perceived obstacles prevent them from pursuing happiness and personal growth. While she regrets not dating more, her message is ultimately one of encouragement, emphasizing the importance of seizing opportunities for connection and love when they arise.

Her reflection serves as a powerful reminder that even the most successful and celebrated individuals grapple with life’s complexities and personal regrets. In a world that often idolizes achievement above all else, Soyou’s candid admission underscores the enduring human need for connection, love, and a balanced life, even amidst the dazzling lights and demanding schedules of the K-pop industry. Her words are a valuable contribution to the ongoing dialogue about the realities of stardom and the personal journeys of those who live it.

Suro Senen

Tim Redaksi & Jurnalis
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